First Published: 10/10/2013

A Strange Day

The Dragon is always the first to get up, and she follows a very strict routine.

She feeds the cats, gets dressed, comes downstairs, goes into the porch to check the gate by the side of the house is still closed, comes through into the kitchen to greet us boys, lets us out to relieve ourselves, cleans up whatever mess I have managed to leave for her, gets our breakfast ready, by which time we are back up the kitchen stairs waiting for her to hurry up.

Today started as normal until she opened the kitchen door to let us out. Boomer ran into the garden, and I tore round the corner, out of sight, barking all the way.

I was actually shouting, “STRANGER! There’s a stranger in the bottom yard”. Daft Dragon thought I was shouting, “SQUIRREL! I’m going to get that squirrel”. (She is perfect at understanding Boomer, but has never mastered greyhound speak. If she bothered to learn Pim speak there would probably be a lot less agro round here!)

Anyhow, I digress. As I disappeared into the bottom yard, giving voice all the way, she continued to get breakfast ready. Boomer soon returned, and the Dragon was irked I was not with him. She left it a few minutes and then went to find and chastise me for not coming when called. Her face must have been like ‘a slapped bottom’ when she saw the bottom gate wide open.

 

During this time I was, by myself and all alone, heroically following the burglar on his bicycle. I must have followed him three quarters of a mile or so up onto the main road. However at the traffic lights some kind Samaritans, to avoid an accident on the road, picked me up and took me to the nearest vet’s. My collar has no address on, but the vet managed to scan my neck and found my identity chip and quickly traced me back to Tia. Wow that was lucky. No dog could get lost if we were all chipped!

 

In the meantime the dragon had been in the car, frantically trawling the local area for an hour and twenty minutes, expecting at any second to be picked up by the police for ‘curb-crawling’.

That’s when her mobile phone rang, causing absolute panic as the calling number was withheld so she expected the worst news. She nearly wet herself when she answered. “He’s ok, he’s at the local vet”, and recognised Debra’s voice.Pim in the car

 

I was picked up, a few minutes later by Mrs. Grumpy. It was not until we got back to the farm, saw what was missing, and the tyre tracks of a bicycle, it became evident, that on this occasion, I was blameless and had actually been trying to warn the stupid woman what was happening! Yep it has been a strange day.

 

The police are coming in the morning. I expect they are bringing a medal for me, or at least a chicken wing!

 

XXX Heroic Pim

Ps. The gates are padlocked tonight

 


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